the slow Journey...

Friday, May 1, 2009

Conflcit

re⋅la⋅tion⋅ship /rɪˈleɪʃənˌʃɪp/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [ri-ley-shuhn-ship] –noun
1. a connection, association, or involvement.
2. connection between persons by blood or marriage.
3. an emotional or other connection between people: the relationship between teachers and students.




Conflicts in a relationship, and im talking about relationships in general not only BGR for those who are so caught up in it, they are inevitable and necessary.

Why Inevitable? As people get closer, their mindsets and mental models tend to work closer and even meld with each other, influence each other more, etc. Tada!, conflicts or disagreements will naturally arise. Becoming more open with each other contributes too.

However these are all vital in the proccess of bringing a relationship (friend, BG, family) closer. Without conflicts there will be no new revelations about each other, no further understanding and ultimately you either 1.remain in the status quo or 2.regress and drift apart, with or without the test of time. Additionally conflicts are a part of human nature, so please dont claim that you've experienced zero conflicts in your life unless you are en emotional dud or a snail. If there are no conflicts in a relationship, how can you even claim to know each other??

Of course, conflicts good provided they do not stay and get resolved. Yup. Not shoved under the bed and ignored just to avoid the conflict. True, ignoring and not laboriously seeking the root of the conflict just to let things move on quickly is a good thing. But Shoving it away just fills up the backup container containing all things undesirable such as these unresolved conflicts. And like all containers they eventually fill up and overflow. Which is a bad thing. It even serves as a catalyst for more conflicts to come and erupt.
Resolution to a conflict means potentially thrashing it out directly to find out whats up with both sides and understanding both parties, empathy. You get to know more about each other's irks, sensitivities, dislikes, etc. Bringing you to a deeper understanding with the other party. Strengthening the relationship! A healthy cycle involving a not so desirable situation.

by the snail at 1:56 AM |